A future dad admitted he has become increasingly frustrated with his wife after she branded him a “bully” for shooting down her baby name picks.
The man said he and his wife have widely different tastes in names, with the woman leaning towards more “unique” options while he prefers more “traditional” names.
He shared his frustration with Reddit, noting his wife’s suggestions have been very “dog-like” and he is worried their child could end up being bullied later in life.
He said: “My wife and I are expecting our first child in the coming months and we have chosen not to find out the sex until the baby is born.
“Things are starting to feel very real now so we’ve started to properly discuss names, but we’ve realised we both have vastly different tastes in name style and we are having a hard time finding the right one.”
The Reddit user said they created a shortlist of names for both boys and girls in the hope of finding an option they would both like.
However, rather than helping them narrow down their lists, they ended up arguing about their tastes – with the man branding her suggestions “tacky and silly” compared to the classic names he proposed.
He continued: “She showed me a shortlist she had put together and thought I might like.
“The names on the list were, for girls, Fern, Fennix, Rhodes, Faun, Brixtyn, and Kinley, and for boys, Spark, Diesel, Quincy, Phoenix, Buck, and Fox.
“These names are tamer than what she suggested before, but I told her they didn’t feel right. I suggested ideas like Rose instead of Rhodes, Felix instead of Phoenix, and Buchanan instead of Buck.”
The dad-to-be said he “finally snapped” when his wife suggested naming their baby Zoomer and simply called the name “stupid”.
The woman called him a “bully” for not supporting her suggestions and erupted into tears, leaving the man “feeling bad” about his tone but still sure he had to speak up.
He continued: “She asked what my problem was and why I was so dismissive of all her ideas and shooting down all the names she likes.
“I told her we were naming a child and not a dog, and that names can have a huge impact on the child.
“I said I don’t want my child to be bullied or taken less seriously because they have a ridiculous name. She told me I was rude and that I was the bully for making her feel unsupported.
“She started crying and went to bed. I decided to give her some time and space so waited till she was sleeping to go to bed. I feel bad about coming at her the way I did, but I also feel it needed to be said.”
The man also shared his own list, which included more traditional names like Garret, William and Edward for a boy and Matilda, Eloise and Katherine for a girl.
Reddit users flocked to show their support for the original poster, noting his wife appeared to consider their child more like an “accessory” than a human being.
They wrote: “So many people name their kids like a nine-year-old naming a goldfish or a valley girl naming a pocket dog.
“Unfortunately, it indicates that the parent considering these names does not see the child as a person, but as a thing, an amusing accessory to show all her fans how cool she is. This is the first of many battles for the identity and autonomy of your child.”
Another said they should consider if they could picture themselves shouting the names they picked to call their child in public.
They wrote: “The best piece of advice on baby naming that I remember from one of the parenting books was, ‘If you can’t imagine yourself shouting this name across a crowded playground, do not give it to your child.’ Best of luck.”
A more conciliatory user suggested creating a joint list and striking out the names neither of them could consider at all.
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